The Swap!

About 2 years ago, an idea started brewing... fueled partially by our Wanderlust, Andrew's inevitable homesickness, and my insatiable need for a "Project"...  Wouldn't it be great to live in Germany again?  The kids could really learn German culture and fine tune their language skills, we could see friends and family more than every three years AND then there are little perks like fantastic beer and real bread.

We had our home in Milwaukee and were thrilled with the kids' schools so completely uprooting everyone wasn't as attractive as a limited one year exchange.  Plus, moving from Germany to the States in 2003 was so emotionally and physically exhausting (and expensive), we weren't too keen to take that on again. The search for programs began.  Lots of possibilities for US citizens with a full-time position... well, I'm the American but Andrew has the full time position so unfortunately we weren't eligible for a single program in the US.  Alright, on to British and German organizations.  Alas, no program will send you to your home country (Andrew also has German citizenship) so no luck there either.  My spirits were getting down a bit at this point. So I called on every and anyone I could think of who might have a contact or lead for us. I contacted a handful organizations like the Geothe Institute, Kennedy Haus, etc. but unfortunately - nothing.

I started sending out cold applications to every American/International school in Germany as well as various language schools hoping to lure another like-minded family.  A few rejections came back.  Must remain postive. Then I began posting on various German/Teacher blogs.  A nibble from a Klemens Graf from Neumarkt in Bavaria.  He saw my post on the AATG message board and wanted to know if we'd already
found a match because if not, they might be interested!  Yahoo!  He and his wife are English teachers and they have three kids.  Perfect match!  The planning began.


The next 1 1/2 years were an emotional roller coaster.  Arranging an exchange privately like this was quite an ordeal - between major undertakings like convincing the Bavarian Ministry of Education and getting visas for the Grafs to smaller but still important issues like health and car insurance and school enrollment.  Andrew's school, Brookfield Academy has been supportive from the get-go.  There seemed to be no end however, to the required documents for various offices, this one needs to be notarized, that one needs to be original. And the German bureaucrats certainly don't have the monopoly on confusing/contradicting requirements -- alone Andrew's green card paperwork cost us over $600 plus the $500 to renew it while we're there. No wonder so many people are here illegally!   Several times during this period, one office or another basically said it wouldn't work out or it isn't possible because of X. Two days later, we'd happen to get someone else on the phone and be told a different story. Finally, it seemed as if all the stars were lining up and it would indeed work out.

We waited until Christmas to tell our own kids.  Declan's first question was if the other kids would play with his dinosaurs then he ran upstairs.  Serena asked where she would have to go to eat lunch (she didn't yet know that school here is only half day so that's a moot question.  While Emma was talking about the bunnies waiting at the Graf house, Declan came back with his PACKED suitcase!  Contents:  3 teddy bears and yes, 20+ dinosaurs.

As our departure date grew closer, we called and skyped more often with the Grafs.  Such an undertaking is not for everyone.  It really does require an incredible amount of trust and honesty and, at the end of the day, we didn't really know these people.  Fortunately, after spending a week in Germany with Andrew's family in the North (blue dot), we were able to drive down to Bavaria to visit the Grafs in Neumarkt (green dot).  

Both sides were clearly nervous, but any concerns we had quickly evaporated.  Klemens and Christina were very friendly and welcoming and since they had done a Fulbright exchange 10 years ago, we knew we were in good hands.  We felt comfortable immediately and Andrew and I agreed, we couldn't have found a better match.

As we walked through the various unique bits that every house has -- "This is broken so you have to jiggle this but don't touch that, etc." I have to admit, I personally felt a little overwhelmed.  So much to remember (and why didn't I write more down?!#!). Of course, we too are entrusting them to every possession in our house but somehow I am much more nervous that we'd break something of theirs.  The reality of this tremendous responsibility sank in.

From the front

We've been in the house now without them for about 3 weeks and it's starting to feel like home -- hey, we've already lost one sock!  How does that happen?  In terms of square footage, it's not an equal exchange.  We definitely are enjoying a larger home for the year. Plus there's a fitness room, office and guest room. We've been exploring - What's in that drawer?  Where are flashlights?  Now where would they put potholders...?  (Nowhere! - it turns out she just uses a towel!) To our great surprise, despite whining about sharing a room for as long as I can remember, the girls only slept in their respective rooms on the first night.  After that, under the guise of "My room is too hot,"  Serena has moved into Emma's room and has been sleeping on a mattress on the floor!  Emma's is not complaining :)

From the backyard

Our front door